March 5, 2015. The day my world forever changed with the birth of my baby girl Riley.
I was writing in my journal (this is the best gift ever!) the day I got home from the hospital with Riley. Since Carter was born I try to document a little something from each day and have since started a new book with Riley. After writing in the 2015 slot, I decided to see where I was exactly one year ago from her birth.
Chills went down my spine.
March 5, 2014. The day my world changed and I had to have a D&C with no heartbeat at 10.5 weeks.
To the day, one year later, my baby girl arrived. The exact day. How insane is that? Faith works in mysterious ways and this was such a sign to me. We may not always know the plan, know why things happen or don’t feel we understand at the time. I’ve never been more thankful for experiencing such heartache because I’m now on such a high and so blessed with my little girl.
You just never know what’s in store.
This post is dedicated to a beautiful friend going through a miscarriage. I hope my story brings you a spark of hope tonight….
I’m still having a hard time grasping the fact that I have a newborn baby girl. The past 48 hours feel like the most amazing dream. Like I did with Carter, I wanted to recount her birth story from when I went into the hospital. So I hope you enjoy…
I checked in Wednesday March 4 at 8am to the hospital. I was all set to begin the induction to bring lil miss into the world! As I am getting hooked up and ready to go with pitocin, my doctor did a final ultrasound to make sure she was ready to go. I will never forget the look on my doctor’s face when he saw the monitor. Riley decided to completely turn and go breech with her head up as high as it could go, not down as it had been just the day before. The new few hours were a waiting game filled with so many emotions. There was talk about not having her that day, which I wanted because my doctor was leaving, and even the possibility of a c section. Well, luckily I was introduced to a version.
Ever heard of one? Until that morning I had no clue what a version was. It’s the process of doctors manually moving the baby back to proper position with head down. What!?! Ryan arrived just in time as I made the decision to go ahead and try to move Riley. I was given a shot to relax the uterus and completely freaked out with what was going to happen. Two doctors on either side rubbed a bunch of oil on my stomach and then well, started to move her. By looking at the ultrasound they were able to push and turn her back into position. It was the craziest experience and hurt really really bad. But it worked!!! And from there I was placed in a tight binder so she wouldn’t move.
From there the party started and it became a waiting game. Slowly the pitocin started to put me into labor. Around 4cm and very uncomfortable contractions, it was time to get the epidural. Thank goodness for the drugs my friends. The best. Ryan and I were the only ones at the hospital for this birth and it was weirdly romantic. We listened to music and talked for hours about Carter, what Riley would look like and of course per usual some business stuff. I will always look back and cherish this time we had together as it was so calming.
While in the same delivery room as when I had Carter, there were so many moments of deja vu. Mainly I quickly remembered how when it comes to birth you just have to get over yourself and your body becomes free reign. Random checks and people all up in ya become the norm and this time around I was weirdly comfortable and not affected at all. Around 6pm my water broke and then things started to pick up. Jump to 11pm and I was 6cm dilated and moving into active labor.
At 12:05am, and my friends I will never forget that time, my epidural wore off. Mind you contractions were coming in strong and it was going to be time to push soon. Holy pain! Oh my goodness! People who opt out are insanely impressive. And crazy. Thankfully by 12:30am the epidural kicked back in as I was 9.5cm. I told my nurse, who for the record was just awesome, that I felt like she was about to pop out. Sure enough my doctor comes in and three minutes later my baby girl was in my arms.
There are few words to fully capture these first moments. For 10 months I have wondered what she is going to look like, how big she will be and will it be love at first sight? This little girl has stolen my heart in ways I truly didn’t think would be possible as I have so much love for Carter. She is a spitting image of her brother with the most docile personality. (so far) We have heard her cry once and she loves to cuddle, which for Ryan and I is so difficult. Ya right!
Carter is already a fabulous big brother who likes to hold the baby. He checks in on her while she’s sleeping, helps bring me diapers and wipes, tries to share his trucks (aka throw them to her which we are watching VERY carefully). When he gets in his car seat he looks over, pats her seat and says “Riley sit.” I’m sure we will have our fair share of jealousy issues but as I fed her on one side this morning and he laid in my arms on the other I was so overwhelmed with love. We are so beyond blessed to have two beautiful and healthy children. I’m literally on a high of happiness!!!
So it’s been a big week in the Capretta household. Someone has moved into their big boy bed, which obviously calls for lots of sleep stalking photos. I’m so sorry in advance Carter for being a creeper. It’s not normal…
When I was pregnant with Carter we were in the process of searching for a new home so I didn’t really go through the “nesting” phase. I knew whatever I did we would be cleaning and moving shortly so there really wasn’t a point. But with this chick, I think the moment I peed on the stick “nesting” hit. The OCD planner in me reveled at the thought of being able to clean out and create a new space for the baby. Immediately I did the calculations on how far apart they would be and decided come January 2015 Carter would be moving into a big boy bed. To me it was silly to completely change a room already set for a baby with a crib, changing table, etc and was easier to get Carter set up in a new environment.
So thanks to a really design-gifted friend, I got this bed. We chose something he could use for a while rather than a toddler bed because again it felt silly to purchase something for such a short time of use. Plus the pullout option for occasional sleepovers with dad were a big selling point. It also helps keep his room feeling like a play space. Ok, you bored yet? You just want to know how it’s gone.
(**disclaimer: I’m TOTALLY jinxing myself with what I’m about to type out to the web universe right now**)
It’s been AMAZING. I couldn’t have imagined the transition going any better while all the wonderful horror stories people have enjoyed telling me about their children. The first night and second night I laid with him until he fell asleep for his naps and at night. To be honest it’s been such a beautiful experience for me too, just shutting down and laying with my little boy. I’ve learned to slow down and take in the precious moments with him as soon there will be another one, but more importantly the day he won’t fall asleep in my arms will come sooner than I realize.
In the morning he wakes up and loves to read his books in bed while I go get his milk. We then read together, talk about things (which is a whole other thing we can talk about…convos with my kid!? what!?) and enjoy starting the day. By the third night I left the room and since then (on night 8) he hasn’t gotten out. Sometimes he cries for a quick second but then he passes right out. He doesn’t get up in the middle of the night and even when he wakes up doesn’t get out. In fact, he’s sleeping longer in the bed than he was in his crib, which is hard to imagine because he’s been such a good sleeper from the beginning.
Anyways, there’s so many negative stories out there about the transition and I honestly was pretty freaked out about it. I’m living proof that it can be awesome and not pose any problems! (so far!) My absolute favorite is when I say it’s time for “night night” and he scurries up into bed, looks at me and says, “Mama. Bed. Books. Blankie.” It’s a summoning I will take any day of the week….