The Greatest Blessing

Jun 5th

To say the past six weeks have been amazing is an understatement. Everyone says having a child will change your life but until he was in my arms and all mine I had honestly no concept of how truly wonderful motherhood would be. It’s crazy to me that it’s only been a couple weeks and how much love you have so suddenly for someone. I thought I would share my thoughts on how everything has been thus far!

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Throughout the first couple months of my pregnancy I started reading quite a lot of baby and parenting books, blogs, etc. I filled my brain with tips on swaddling, feeding, post-birth care and so much more. One site would say one thing and another book say the opposite. It got to be so overwhelming that I decided to not read anything and just “wing it.” Not to mention there’s always someone out there giving their piece of advice which for the most part I enjoy…until they tell you that you’re doing something wrong. As much as I wanted to be completely prepared for being a mom, I knew that every baby is different and what worked for one may not work for Carter. The whole control concept went out the window again.

It’s these first weeks with him that I have learned that your maternal instinct truly sets in. I’ve gotten to know what works for him and what doesn’t. I’ve gotten to know for the most part what cry means gas, which cry means I’m hungry, which cry means I’m tired and my favorite the poop cry (and most adorable constipated look). With all the time I spend with him we’ve bonded in a way I wasn’t prepared for because it’s so much more of a blessing that you can even imagine. And what I will say for future moms out there is that if there’s anything I’ve learned it’s do what’s best for you and your baby. 

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Carter is such a pleasant baby. He’s only fussy when he’s gassy, hungry or got poop in his pants, but wouldn’t you be too? He’s made the whole parenting thing such a pleasure that I know if we have another they’re going to be a complete terror devil child. Right? But I’ve learned that we don’t need to “go by the book.” For example, everyone says how important swaddling is. If you want to hear my child scream bloody murder then swaddle him. He hates it. He loves having his hands out (in case you didn’t notice in my IG photos). I tried to many nights to use blankets or wraps but no matter how he was he cried. Let his arms out and he’s the happiest baby on the block.

Or how about don’t let a baby sleep on their stomach. Whoops, that’s what we do. On a sidenote, he has had an extremely strong neck since birth and has been able to lift and rotate his head from week one. With his strength I feel completely comfortable having him on his stomach. And it’s funny because the reactions have been different. I mentioned it to a woman in my yoga class and there was the most judgmental look like she’s saying “oh wow, you’re a great mom” (cue sarcastic and bitchy tone). Then my mom is completely opposite and had the response of “you slept on your stomach and you’re still here.” You do what’s good for you.

And my personal favorite is where he sleeps. Crib…nah. Bassinet…nope. Right on me…yep! This child loves to cuddle and loves to be on my chest. So every night we have a dance party to usually Zac Brown Band, Beyonce, MJ and Prince of course and then he falls asleep right on me. It may not be the most conventional method but honestly we both sleep better. We have usually 3-5 hour stretches which is great for both of us. It allows me to be better rested which ultimately makes me a better mom for him.

So I guess to be completely real with you everything is going amazing. Since the day after we brought him home we’ve gotten out. Whether it’s going to restaurants, yoga class or our noisy gym this child is on the go. People say you will be tired, shouldn’t bring your baby out, etc but continuing life as it was before has been one of the best things for me and him. At 6 weeks old he can sleep anywhere including our gym with blasting rap music. It’s awesome. He’s great being around other people and hopping in the car to get on the go. We’ve also had a couple dates nights already which are so important for keeping our relationship as husband and wife strong (especially since we also run a business together). Parents, spouses and co-workers all in one.

I think when you go into parenthood, especially the first couple weeks, you just need a positive mindset. Usually the first thing people say about having a baby is about the no sleep and how tired you will be. Duh, you know that you have to get up and it’s going to be tough sometimes. But it’s how you react to that. As weird as it seems I sometimes love getting up in the middle of the night to feed him because he’s just so darn cute and I don’t mind every waking second I get to spend. Because guess what? This isn’t going to last forever so I want to take it all in. Also work with your partner and don’t be superwoman. I have a great supply of breastmilk so I primarily pump and do bottles. This allows for my husband to take a feeding here or there if I’m really tired. Spread the wealth!!

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Finally, I’m not perfect and have cried a few times which is OK! Don’t feel bad or be hard on yourself. I cried at 4am after trying everything to help my gassy baby who was crying for 4 hours non-stop get comfortable with being gassy. But 20 minutes and a big poop later we were better than ever. I cried one night when I had a busy day of work and was just exhausted. It happens. But other than that I couldn’t be happier and have so much fun with this little man.

I’m going to continue taking in every moment I can. The nightly bath time. The hiccups and then little giggle daily. The new smiles we’re getting. The times he pees on us by accident. The little noises when he’s sleeping. The big sighs. The endless cuddling. The leg dances when he’s happy. The cutest pout face when he’s about to cry. (truth….I’m starting to cry writing this right now because I just love him so much and it’s recounting these moments that make everything worth it) The amount of joy he has brought to my life is endless and something I cannot fully fathom. Every tear that it took to get him here has been so worth it. He’s the greatest blessing.

Each moment I spend with him is such a gift.

Mother's Love

photos by Caliendo Photography